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When I first came across this audiobook, which was written and narrated by Professional Dating Coach Alan Roger Currie, I predicted that it was probably going to contain some beliefs, opinions, and assertions that I would inevitably find myself in disagreement with. After listening to the audiobook, which runs 9 hours and 25 minutes, my prediction was pretty much on-point.
The audiobook, Currie’s third in a series, is designed to help men identify women who Currie refers to as ‘Wholesome Pretenders,’ which the author and narrator says are women who present a disingenuous public facade of being a ‘prudish, strictly monogamy-oriented good girl’ when in fact, these same women possess a side to them that is more erotically uninhibited and not really averse to engaging in one or more episodes of casual non-relationship sex with a man of choice.
In Currie’s first audiobook, Mode One: Let the Women Know What You’re REALLY Thinking, the main message was to encourage single heterosexual men to approach women of interest and then fairly quickly let them know what their true romantic or sexual desires and interests were in a confident, upfront, and straight-to-the-point manner. From that point, Currie asserts that men will be able to identify women in one of four categories: Reciprocators, Rejecters, Wholesome Pretenders, or Manipulative Timewasters.
Currie’s second audiobook, The Possibility of Sex: How Naive and Lustful Men are Manipulated by Women Regularly primarily focuses on the women who fall into Currie’s fourth category (the Manipulative Timewasters). The audiobook I listened to primarily focuses on the women who fall into Currie’s third category (the Wholesome Pretenders).
In this one, Say it Again, and I assume his other two audiobooks, Currie divides men into two categories: Alpha males and Beta males. He describes Alpha males as those who are very confident, erotically dominant, and really don’t care about the criticisms and negative feedback they may receive from women who perceive their behavior as rude or disrespectful. Currie describes Beta males as more of the well-mannered, want-to-be-liked-by-women-very-badly ‘gentleman’ types who are commonly written off as weak and unlikely to get lucky with women, particularly outside the context of marriage or a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.
In a nutshell, Currie conveys to men that being a cocky and borderline rude Alpha male is far more seductive to women than presenting yourself as a polite, modest nice guy type. You get the sense that Currie believes that when men exhibit behaviour that attracts criticisms and insults from women, that this is a good thing, while conversely believing that when men exhibit behaviour that attracts nothing but praise and compliments from women that this is more so a bad thing for men, and will eventually result in those men having a woman place them in the dreaded ‘friend-zone.’
I did not agree with Currie’s primary message in his audiobook. That said, Currie does repeatedly distinguish between a man who is an extremely confident and erotically dominant Alpha male who would choose to verbally seduce a woman with X-rated words versus a man who is a bitter, resentful, blatant misogynist who would rather rape or date rape women after getting them inebriated without much conversation, an important distinction.
Currie’s point seems to be that if there is a very thin, fine line between behaviour toward a woman that will be perceived as so safe and cautious that it might bore a woman, and behaviour toward a woman that is so brash, crass, and blatantly sexual that it might turn a woman completely off, then Currie wants you to walk up to that very thin fine line and position yourself right there indefinitely without necessarily crossing that line in either direction. A true challenge for most men indeed.
Part One of Currie’s audiobook is the Self-Help portion, and Part Two of the audiobook features six Verbal Seduction Stories that are based on Currie’s real-life conversations with women who were more or less Wholesome Pretender types. These six stories include erotic role-play between Currie and some vocal actresses that essentially amounts to ‘audio porn’ for his listeners. Some of those role-play excerpts are really hot, while others are just amusing.
Here is where I begin to have problems with Currie’s message: Is a brass, confident, self-assured and self-important Alpha male really what is needed in today’s dating scene? Isn’t this one or two steps shy of being the BDSM oriented ‘Dom’ and ultra-controlling Alpha male championed by the Fifty Shades of Grey book and recently released movie? As mentioned, Currie wants men to walk on the very thin fine line, but the question is, will most men have the discipline and savvy demeanour to avoid crossing that line into a zone of chauvinism, sexism, and misogyny with women? I believe this is a very risky proposition for the average male in society looking to transition into the more seemingly popular Alpha male territory with the main objective to getting laid casually with more women.
Secondly, I simply do not like Currie’s four categories of women that he emphasises in his three audiobooks. For example, Currie claims that all women who are of the so-called Manipulative Timewaster ilk are out to manipulate all of the naive and lustful men of the world. I disagree. This makes me feel like Mr. Currie does not have a complete understanding of how the female mind really works.
Women don’t necessarily know within the first ten to fifteen minutes of their first conversation with a man if they want to become romantic or intimate with him in the long run. If a man approaches a woman in a bar, certain factors will determine the type of relationship, if any, she will ultimately want with that man.
A woman may not know instantly what it is she wants and doesn’t want, and a woman changing her mind in the early stages of a first interaction with a man is common. This is why a woman may appear flirtatious at first, but somewhat cold later on. Calling women who change their minds ‘Manipulative Timewasters’ suggests that most women have an ulterior motive, which is to take advantage of and emotionally wound men. In my opinion, this is simply not true. Such suggestions vilify women who want to take time to get to know a man’s personality and character before making the decision to become sexually intimate with a man of choice.
This audiobook is a bit of fun for men who want to learn how to seduce women as a result of direct verbal communication (as opposed to strictly non-verbal cues). Currie’s third and allegedly final audiobook does indeed contain some good tips for the more Beta male types who may be lacking in the area of personal self-confidence and want to avoid the emotional pain of rejection. And again, the audio porn portions are worth listening to (for both men AND women). At minimum, you will be entertained.
I appreciate that men have the right to read or listen to self-help books that will encourage them to be more comfortable in their own skin, and ultimately develop into a man who is more real and authentic with women. But I’m just saying that listeners should be aware that women are more three-dimensional than what Currie seems to suggest that they are, and that being verbally direct with women to the point of being potentially perceived by women as crass or rude isn’t always the best way to go, nor the only way to seduce a woman into agreeing to engage in casual sex.
By the time I was finished listening to the audiobook in its entirety, I would conclude that even though Currie is not exactly like the fictional character of Fifty Shades’ Christian Grey, he was only one or two steps away. Right on that very thin fine line.